Getting Ready for 3-Day A Week Mail Delivery

...First: get drunk, then: go to the bookie

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So the Post Office wants us to consider an end to Saturday deliveries. Is that a bad thing?  It’d mean no more weekends, seeing my neighbor waiting in front of his house in his bathrobe. His bathrobe, if I’m lucky. Whether he does this weekdays as well, I can’t say: I’m out the door too early.
But it’s what Postmaster General Patrick Donahoe says may come after that, that interests me: 3-day a week delivery within 15 years. (USA Today) Really? That surprises me.  Not the 3-day part, but the 15 years part. I’d have guessed much sooner.  Email is only going to get simpler, and wider-spread. Private shippers already outstrip Zippy –or whatever the mascot’s name is– for packages. And I’m not sure even mass-marketers (read: ‘junk mail’) would mind a reduced schedule. What’s left?
All this, at a time a British newspaper (Uh oh -Ed.) reports that a U.K. mailman stashed 31-thousand items from his daily rounds in his home and garden shed, because he was too drunk to deliver them. That, plus he used his time to shop and go to the bookie.
Some of the items dated back to 2007. He’s been suspended.  That means, he has time for the U.S. to hire him as a consultant on delayed delivery.  We could send him a letter, inviting… oh, wait.

One Comment

  1. L. Lionheart says:

    I think the post office guy (officially) is Mr. Zip, or is it Manic Mailman?😉

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