LOS ANGELES (CBSLA) — Chrissy Teigen spoke out for the first time since losing her third child in a miscarriage with a heartrending Medium post.
Teigen, who announced the surprise pregnancy on social media, shocked many when she also shared the heartbreaking loss. The supermodel and cookbook author said the baby — who she and her husband, musician and singer John Legend, had already begun to call Jack — was just 20 weeks old when her doctors determined he would not make it.
“My doctors diagnosed me with partial placenta abruption,” Teigen wrote in the post. “I had always had placenta problems. I had to deliver Miles a month early because his stomach wasn’t getting enough food from my placenta. But this was my first abruption.”
Teigen said she had already been on bedrest, and was admitted to the hospital a few days before her doctor told her it was time to say goodbye. She described in great detail the medical complications that led up to the loss of the baby, and even though many of her fans and followers criticized her for sharing photos of their ordeal, Teigen said she had no regrets in her characteristically blunt manner.
“I cannot express how little I care that you hate the photos. How little I care that it’s something you wouldn’t have done,” she wrote. “I lived it, I chose to do it, and more than anything, these photos aren’t for anyone but the people who have lived this or are curious enough to wonder what something like this is like. These photos are only for the people who need them. The thoughts of others do not matter to me.”
She did say that she felt bad to make her family’s grief so public, but also expressed gratitude for the kindness she has received from her fans and strangers she sees while she is out and about. She urged women to also share their stories, for everyone else to be kind when hearing them.
“People say an experience like this creates a hole in your heart. A hole was certainly made, but it was filled with the love of something I loved so much,” Teigen wrote. “It doesn’t feel empty, this space. It feels full.”
Teigen said that Jack’s ashes will be added to the soil of a tree in the new home her family moved into in anticipation of needing room for a new baby.