By Kent Shocknek

Do we believe this?  I found it on the internet, so it probably has to be true. Apparently in China, you can get a job (and by ‘you,’ I mean ‘I’) where all you have to do is show up and be a white guy. The usually reliable oddity central  reports that Chinese companies hire white guys to sit near the windows –talk about ‘window dressing’ —  and,  voila!,  that Chinese company has more credibility among clients it’s trying to impress. The thinking apparently goes, that –if the company can afford to hire white guys– it must be successful enough to be a desirable place to do business.

I’m conflicted: on one hand, I’m deeply offended by the obvious racism of such a ploy as this.  How dare they think I’m smart, just because I’m a white guy ? On the other hand, I am smart enough to know I’d love to sit around and play on the computer all day, and get paid for not actually doing anything productive. (Insert your joke here. -Ed.)

I’m not sure how you get one of these jobs:  I’m not sure what would look good on a resume. If you have some insider knowledge, let me know. But I probably won’t read your email, because my computer’s screen is frozen on the 8th level of Bejeweled. And if that doesn’t qualify me for the job, I don’t know what does.






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