TALE OF THE TAPE

Tale Of Two Teams: The Fantasy Football Legend Vs. The Fantasy Football Basement Dweller

First Place Fantasy Team
Last Place Fantasy Team
St. Louis Rams v Dallas Cowboys
AFC Championship - Baltimore Ravens v New England Patriots
Team Name
The [r]Ed Hochuli Peppers (ECHP)
Joe Buck Yourself
#1 Draft Pick
DeMarco Murray
Tom Brady
DRAFT DAY PREDICTION
"I can see, in ten years, Coach Harbaugh and Alex Smith still working together like the old married couple they really are. He'll coach 5 rings out of him. Together forever."
"There's no way Arian Foster is playing this year. When you're that big, rehabbing a torn hamstring is like trying to turn a pile of pulled pork into a pig again."
OVERALL RECORD GOING INTO WEEK 14
10-2
2-10
SEASON HIGHLIGHT
Beating team "Your Mom" 144-28 because someone forgot to wake up before 10am PST to set their team thanks to a hangover.
Coming up with the idea to use Robert Griffin's head as the star of the family Christmas tree thereby referring to it for the season as "RG-Tree."
SEASON LOWLIGHT
Losing to "[team]" the same week the office floods from Hurricane Sandy. When it rains, it pours...into your basement and corporate server room.
Trading Tom Brady (based on the fact that he's an UGGS spokesperson and model) for "literally anyone," and playing Mark "Butt Tackle" Sanchez instead.
BEST SMACK TALK
"Seriously, John, if you don't pay the entry fee AND I beat you, I get your girlfriend. I already talked to her and she's fine and encouraging it."
"Me : You :: Best Thing Ever : Worst Thing Ever"
WEEKLY EXCUSE
"I'm not bragging, but obviously I could manage a real NFL team. I'm literally the most talented athlete I know and that's reinforced by my record. You can't argue with numbers."
"DeMarco Murray's foot is my Achilles heel. I knew I should've traded for the Muscle Hamster. How's someone supposed to count on Felix Jones?!"

MORE TALES OF THE TAPE

  1. GREEN BAY, WI - JANUARY 8:  Aaron Rodgers #12 of the Green Bay Packers drops back to pass in the second quarter during the NFC Wild Card game against the New York Giants at Lambeau Field on January 8, 2017 in Green Bay, Wisconsin. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images) ARLINGTON, TX - DECEMBER 26: Dak Prescott #4 of the Dallas Cowboys throws against the Detroit Lions during the first half at AT&T Stadium on December 26, 2016 in Arlington, Texas. (Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)
    Divisional Round Tale: Green Bay Packers at Dallas Cowboys

    The Packers look to avenge a loss to the Cowboys in the regular season.

  2. PITTSBURGH, PA - JANUARY 08:  Ben Roethlisberger #7 of the Pittsburgh Steelers hands off to Le\'Veon Bell #26 during the second quarter against the Miami Dolphins in the AFC Wild Card game at Heinz Field on January 8, 2017 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.  (Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images) KANSAS CITY, MO - DECEMBER 25:  Quarterback Alex Smith #11 of the Kansas City Chiefs in action during the game against the Denver Broncos at Arrowhead Stadium on December 25, 2016 in Kansas City, Missouri.  (Photo by Jason Hanna/Getty Images)
    Divisional Round Tale: Pittsburgh Steelers at Kansas City Chiefs

    The red-hot Steelers head to KC for a rematch with a Chiefs team they throttled 43-14 in the regular season.

  3. HOUSTON, TX - JANUARY 07:  Brock Osweiler #17 of the Houston Texans hands off to Lamar Miller #26 at NRG Stadium on January 7, 2017 in Houston, Texas.  (Photo by Tim Warner/Getty Images) MIAMI GARDENS, FL - JANUARY 01: Tom Brady #12 of the New England Patriots points to the defense during the 1st quarter against the Miami Dolphins at Hard Rock Stadium on January 1, 2017 in Miami Gardens, Florida. (Photo by Eric Espada/Getty Images)
    Divisional Round Tale: Houston Texans at New England Patriots

    The Texans head to Foxboro, the site of a 27-0 loss in the regular season and now have to face Tom Brady this time around.

See All Tales of the Tape

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