The Fab Mom On 2: How And Why To Get Kids To Do Chores
Summer can be a busy time packed with camps, activities, vacations and classes for school-age kids. But do you assign your children chores over the summer? In a 2014 study that surveyed over 1,000 parents from Braun Research, 82 percent of parents claimed they did chores as children but only 28 percent said they now require their kids to do chores. With a shift in emphasis happening over school and test performances over across the country, some developmental psychologists are concerned that parents are missing the mark when it comes to raising well-rounded, compassionate and collaborative people. How to make things right? Start by taking out the trash.
The act doing chores builds self-esteem, work ethic to finish a job, empathy for others and the ability to be part of a larger team.
How to start? Consider these age-appropriate activities:
- Infants: Position your baby to watch you work — in the kitchen, in the garden, in the laundry room. Babies first begin learning by observation, which then evolves into imitation.
- Toddlers (ages 1-3): Enlist 1-3-year-olds to take items to the trash can, put dirty clothes in the hamper, wipe down surfaces with baby wipes and pick up their toys.
- Little kids (ages 4-6): Small kids can set and clear the table for meals, help unload groceries, make their beds and clean and organize their rooms (with help). In the 2014 study "Helping" Versus "Being a Helper": Invoking the Self to Increase Helping in Young Children in the journal Child Development, researchers found that asking 3-6-year-old children to "be a helper" rather than asking about "helping" found the kids to be more responsive when the word "helper" was used. The word "helper" (in its noun form) reflects an identity, and children were found more likely to pursue a positive identity.
As for older kids or teenagers who just don't want to participate? Try these tips:
- Resist making chores a form of punishment and instead shift into making certain tasks a way of life that everyone in family participates in.
- Set a timer to turn the task into a race or game between siblings to finish as much as possible within that time frame only, whether it be loading the dishwasher, taking out the trash or picking up the family room.
- Use a reward or allowance system to motivate a structured pattern of behavior for certain times of the day, like filling up the dog's water in the morning or picking up the bedroom at night.
- Resist to criticize a less-than-perfect result and give praise when it's due.
Jill Simonian is a Parenting Lifestyle Contributor, appearing on CBS Los Angeles every Wednesday on News at 5pm and Friday mornings at 6:30am. Her personal blog is TheFabMom.com. Follow Jill on Twitter @jillsimonian and connect with her on Facebook.
