STUDIO CITY (CBSLA.com) — Trying to read the road map to “Modern Dating”? If so, author Chiara Atik has the directions.
Atik stopped by the KCAL9 studios Monday to talk about her new book, “Modern Dating,” that provides practical tips for dating in the 21st century and has been as “big-sister advice at its best” by Publishers Weekly.
Online dating do’s and don’ts: 5 reasons why it’s time to try online dating:
• You’re too busy to meet new people
• You’re totally over the bar-hookup scene
• If you get set up one more time you might have to kill somebody
• If you get your friends involved it can be kind of fun
• You just need to get your dating confidence back
• For sites with “About Me” section, use this formula: 3 hobbies + 2 favorite things + 1 personality descriptor
• For women the odds are in their favor, the ratio of girls to guys dating online is 91 (F): 100(M) in LA the ratio is 101(F):100(M)
• Have a killer profile photo-the five types of photos everyone should have:
• The super flattering close-up,
• The “I clean Up Nice” shot from a formal event,
• The action shot
• The “Oh” this is just me hanging out at Machu Picchu” vacation shot
• The mid laughter, having too much to even notice the camera shot.
• Avoid these profile photos
• The mirror self portrait
• The cropped photo
• The photo with your ridiculous distractingly attractive cousin
• Photos of you with babies or small children
• Any photos with duckface
• Do not copy an past the same messages, personalized messages get a better response rate.
• Don’t wink: the “wink” or “Flirt” feature on online dating sites is basically useless.
• Do not sign your last name
What are the five reasons?
• The economics of dating today–who should pay?
• Your salary shouldn’t determine your dating pool
• It’s okay to be the breadwinner and still expect chivalry
• Be aware of each other’s financial limitations
• Men don’t want to be meal tickets
Who should pay? The new 50/50
• Splitting the bill 50/50 is that it assumes both people are able to spend the same amount, something which is increasingly rare. So, the person who invited the other person out should probably offer to pay.
• Don’t choose an expensive activity if you can’t pay for both.
• Bring enough cash to cover your portion, just in case.
• Offer to pay once, and if he declines, don’t insist.( Thanks him)
• In relationship where both parties make the same amount of money, switch off at equal rates—but don’t split the check, it’s unromantic and awkward at best.
What are the economics of today’s dating?
• How can one become a better flirt, can you share some flirting techniques?
• Establish your target(usually a stranger), and make quick eye contact three times
• Find a reason to move past the target to the other side of the room
• Keep holding eye contact! And right when you’re moving past him, smile.
• Technology and social media radically changed dating, learn how to navigate the waters of dating when it comes to technology (Twitter/Facebook/Gchat/Texting)
• It can be stressful to ask someone out, what are the best times to ask someone out?
The traits of a perfect first-date spot
• It’s somewhere you like but not your favorite spot
• It’s close to other things
• It’s not too loud
• It’s far enough away from where you live
• It’s lively enough
• It’s someplace you can chill for up to two hours
The worst words to say on a date
• “What do you want to do?”
• “I’m fine with whatever”
• “So what should we do”
According to Chiara’s research and data from How About We, these places are the most popular dates locations in Los Angeles.
1) Ride the ferris wheel and play carnival games at Santa Monica Pier
2) Hike through Griffith Park to the observatory and see a show at the planetarium.
3) Explore the latest exhibits at LACMA, then discuss them over drinks.
4) Take in some exhibits at The Getty, then have a picnic on the lawn.
5) Try the caramelized bananas and French Toast at Chateau Marmont
Other LA facts:
• There are more breakfast dates in LA than in any other city.
• Yoga is more popular in LA than in any other city.
• Wine is overwhelmingly popular (57% / beer & liquor about equal at 22% and 21% respectively)
• Going to the beach, hiking, and doing yoga are the most popular date activities
• Pizza, food trucks and cupcakes are the most popular date foods.
• Star gazing (Griffith observatory, Chateau Marmont), museums (LACMA, Getty), and the beach (Most popular date activity, Santa Monica Pier).