The Greatest Vending Machine, Ever Invented. Ever.

7-11 is rolling out mashed-potato-dispensing vending machines at stores here in the U.S. USA! USA! Actually,  the technology is not new: they already have them in Singapore, and a similar device delivers grease to heavy equipment pistons on farm machinery assembly lines.

$1, and a cup under the nozzle (That must be an attractive sound. -Ed.), and you're in biz. The chicken gravy only takes two seconds, to drip on top. Gizmodo makes the legitimate point that you should be able to get just the chicken gravy, if you want. If you see one of these devices in So Cal, I want to drop $5 or $6, just to see how horrible the concept of dining has become know about it, for the sake of science.  Top it off with an adjacent Slurpee, and stick a fork in me, I'm done.